


Christmas Came Early

by Eliyes



Category: Justice League International (Comics)
Genre: F/M, Holidays
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-26
Updated: 2013-09-26
Packaged: 2017-12-27 17:53:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/981879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eliyes/pseuds/Eliyes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ted didn’t have anything against Christmas. Well, not really. He preferred a slow building up to the holiday, though. And he’d really gone with minimal decorations since his mother died… His father didn’t seem to really notice the holiday…</p><p>And even with all this, “Santa Baby” did not go <i>away</i>. Booster and Bea especially kept it alive. Bea vamped all over the kitchen one morning, singing it. Booster just could not seem to <i>stop</i> humming it. There was an entire day when Ted had not heard it from either of them, and he had carefully not mentioned it, in hopes that it would go away.</p><p>But it hadn’t.</p><p>Because <i>New York City itself</i> was <i>against</i> him!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Christmas Came Early

**Author's Note:**

> Subjects mature and immature implied.
> 
> This fic was originally posted on Livejournal October 27, 2005.

It was all Booster’s fault.

Ted Kord hunched over a worktable in his lab and agreed with himself on this assessment, unfair and somewhat untrue though it be.

Yes, _somehow_ it was Booster’s fault. Not Ted’s fault at all. Nope.

Granted, Ted had been the one to invite Booster to do some Hallowe’en barhopping with him. And of course, with the Bug, bar-hopping took on a whole new dimension. They’d been going coast-to-coast, and it had been a lot of fun. They’d even gotten in a little crime-fighting, and _that_ had been fun.

But Booster – poor, deprived, time-tossed boy – had seen multiple people dressed as the same famous figure and asked who it was. Ted had been aghast when Booster pointed to the fifth Marilyn Monroe in wig in white halterneck dress (and not just because it was the best one they’d seen so far but for the adam’s apple).

“ _Marilyn Monroe!_ ”

“Who?”

“ _ **Marilyn Monroe!!**_ ”

Booster’s expressive shrug had prompted Ted’s immediate vow to _show_ Booster who Marilyn Monroe was. Because how could he go through life without knowing, really? Ted was vaguely depressed that she hadn’t somehow been deified by Booster’s time – after all, they certainly knew of _Cher_. Gah!

So, November first, Ted had gone to a couple of video rental places and gotten out everything involving Marilyn he could find, including at least one biographical movie. He’d made Booster watch “The Seven Year Itch” _immediately_. Booster had independently selected “Gentlemen Prefer Blondes” and “How to Marry a Millionaire” as the next to show, by which point he’d been joined in the rec room by Bea, who seemed to know the movies by rote – in Portuguese.

The next few days had been a Marilyn Monroe movie-a-thon. Ted had missed most of it, as a small crisis came up at K.O.R.D. Industries. At some point other people had started contributing to the Marilyn lovefest with additional material. And _that_ was where the trouble snowballed.

When he found out who’d done it, he’d _kill_ them!

It could have been _anyone_ , though. Bea. Max. Oberon. Hell, it might have been J’onn or even _Guy_.

But someone – _someone_ – had added Marilyn’s performance of “Santa Baby” to the mix.

Kill. Them.

The song was more addictive than _cocaine_. _Everyone_ seemed to be singing it – well, except Tora. In the midst of nearly everyone around her suddenly turning into Christmas carol cover artists, Tora was spearheading a campaign to combat the blatantly materialistic and flirty song with more wholesome fare. She had an impressive collection of Christmas music for a non-Christian.

Unfortunately, this meant that the JLI’s New York embassy was pretty much constantly barraged with carols about love and peace on earth and goodwill – and it was _infectious_. Decorations had started going up in the second week of _November_. Ted suspected Oberon of starting it, though Tora might have rolled with it to help make her point – and the others were getting in on it, he knew. New decorations appeared everyday. The embassy was the most decorated building on the block, which was _ridiculous_ when you considered how few of the people in it would otherwise celebrate Christmas. J’onn and Scott weren’t even from Earth, Booster was an atheist from the future, Tora was a goddess from another religion, he wasn’t really clear on the state of Christmas in Brazil…

Ted didn’t have anything against Christmas. Well, not really. He preferred a slow building up to the holiday, though. And he’d really gone with minimal decorations since his mother died… His father didn’t seem to really notice the holiday…

And even with all this, “Santa Baby” did not go _away_. Booster and Bea especially kept it alive. Bea vamped all over the kitchen one morning, singing it. Booster just could not seem to _stop_ humming it. There was an entire day when Ted had not heard it from either of them, and he had carefully not mentioned it, in hopes that it would go away.

But it hadn’t.

Because _New York City itself_ was _against_ him! The three of them had been trying to put a stop to a supervillain rampage that had ended in a mall, and when the excitement was over, what was playing on the Muzak? “Santa Baby”, of course! Booster and Bea had looked at each other and grinned, and then started _dancing_ and singing to it.

And then Scott, like New York City, had joined the plot against Ted’s sanity. He came to the embassy one day with a huge armload of real mistletoe, blushingly explaining that Barda “bought too much” before fleeing to the monitor room. It was everywhere.

And Bea and Booster were everywhere _with_ it, taking advantage of the custom to suck each other’s tonsils out.

And that – that was really getting rather annoying. Not that he was jealous, or anything. Well, okay, he was currently single – but that didn’t mean he was jealous or lonely! Not at all!

Batman was notably absent from the Embassy more and more, the lucky bastard.

So now, in an attempt to avoid Christmas, Ted was down in his lab getting some work done. Except that he wasn’t. He just couldn’t concentrate. He kept catching himself idling coming up with new lyrics to “Santa Baby”, or doodling Christmas-themed Bea in his notes.

“Arrgh!” He threw his hands up in the air when he found himself intently shading a tableau involving Bea doing unnatural things with a set of reindeer horns.

And that was when he noticed the muffled laughter behind him, a breath shockingly close –

and then a Santa hat with mistletoe pinned around the brim was dropped on his head, and Bea, wearing a clever collection of green ribbons and truly terrifying spike heels, was dropped into his lap.

He blinked, surprised, a part of his mind desperately praying she didn’t notice the drawing on the table behind her. And then Booster was also in view, picking that drawing up and folding it away into a pocket before sitting on the table. Booster, fortunately, was dressed in slacks and a pullover, not ribbons. He grinned at Ted.

“Well, Santa? Aren’t you going to ask her what she wants for Christmas?”

Bea pouted at him impressively and wriggled a bit, and Ted discovered that he had to put his arms around her to keep her from, er, falling off his lap.

“If you break into song, I will fill your stocking with rocks.”

“Promise I won’t,” Bea said in a solemn, sexy voice. Ted sighed. He was going to have to play along.

“Alright, young lady – if lady is the word – what do you want for Christmas?”

“I’ll tell you, Santa – but I want it _before_ Christmas,” Bea replied, running a nail lightly down Ted’s chest. His temperature rose.

“A – ahem. Alright?”

“I want a Teddy.”

“Excuse me?” Ted squeaked.

“I want –” she said, moving to speak directly into his ear. “– a Teddy.”

And then she started nibbling on his ear. Booster winked and made his exit, leaving Ted to give Bea her Christmas present.

**Author's Note:**

> I declare Author’s fiat to say that Marilyn performing "Santa Baby" really happened in the DCU, seeing as there’s this huge real world debate over whether she did or not.


End file.
